Thinking
by Alusy
Summary: Gai contemplates the consequences the preliminary matches of the Chuunin Exams caused his students. All the hopes, all the dreams, suddenly brought to an end. But maybe that was what they needed. No pairings. Team Gai-centric.


Just a quick drabble about Team Gai. I was just thinking about how they felt after the preliminary matches. I couldn't accept the fact that Tenten just shook off her loss and continued with life, and I feel like the consequences of their losses (and Neji's win) should have brought about even the smallest change in their ways of thinking. So I wrote this up. Hope the character's aren't _too_ OOC.

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><p>The first part of the Chuunin Exams completely destroyed Team Gai.<p>

It was Gai who first fell apart at this realization. He wasn't quite sure when it hit him. Maybe it was the absolute shock on Tenten's face when she woke up from her coma. Maybe it was the palpable disgust he felt emanating from Neji after his confrontation with his cousin. Or maybe it was Lee, whose fragile life was only supported by thin wires attached to slow, beeping machines. But it had hit him, a hard realization, and he had fallen to his knees. No amount of training could have prepared his team for this. It didn't matter how emotionally strong or detached they acted.

But he was their sensei, a mentor to look up to no matter how bad times got. He already failed as their teacher once, he wasn't about to let the rest of the cliff crumble. He was determined to pick up each small piece and glue everything back together if he had to. It would be a tedious task, but Gai was never one to back down from a challenge. Maybe that was why he had been called reckless over and over again. Maybe that was what led to his team's downfall.

Neji was the only one who won his battle, but that was no cause for celebration. The ruthless manner of how he inflicted pain made it clear that he couldn't have cared less about his cousin's life. There was a certain shame Gai felt when the other Jounin helped him stop the enraged student. He had trusted Neji to deal with the problem on his own. If he had only said something, perhaps pried a bit and tried to reason with the Hyuuga, then maybe... He shook his head.

The next round of the Chuunin Exams was coming up in only a few more weeks. And no matter how disappointed Gai felt in himself and his student, he couldn't just abandon Neji. Not when the title of Chuunin was so close. It was his duty as a teacher, if nothing else, that pushed him to help. But he was too distraught over Lee's current condition. Most of all, he couldn't find the words to confront the prodigy. After the match with Hinata, he was sure that anything he said to Neji wouldn't leave so much as a dent. The fight caused Neji to close himself off to the world. If anything was keeping the cold-hearted boy warm, it was his anger and haterd.

Gai waited until Tenten recovered from her match. He figured the only way to communicate was to be through her, the ever-mediator of the team. He told her that Neji requested her presence for training.

Tenten looked at him. There was something about her blank stare that made Gai's stomach churn. When she finally spoke, she asked if he was absolutely sure.

"Yes," Gai reassured, patting her shoulder gently. "And with Lee..." He paused and, finding it too painful to continue, concluded simply. "Neji needs a sparring partner."

Still, Tenten remained frigid. She softly inquired why he couldn't train with the Hyuugas at the compound. It was strange. She never turned down an opportunity to help a teammate. But the way she uneasily shifted her weight and touched her bandaged arms, it was almost as though she didn't want to.

"It's very... _strained_ at the moment," was the simple reply.

Hinata was still hospitalized after her match. The Hyuugas had done their best to hush the event up, doing everything in their power to avoid the information from leaking. If someone else found out that a branch member had retaliated and almost killed the next in line for head of the family, it would only result in chaos.

But Gai wasn't sure if Tenten knew of the match. She had been unconscious during the fight and, as far as he knew, hadn't had contact with her teammates since. He shook his head. If she found out, it would be from Neji. Besides, she usually had good intuition about such things. Tenten knew more things about Neji than Lee and Gai did.

Gai attempted to lift the mood with a joke. "Neji's been training alone for almost a week. There's only so many times he can close a tree's chakra points."

Tenten seemed to contemplate whether this was worth reacting to. Suddenly, she broke out into a watery smile.

"It's probably better than training with me, Gai-sensei. Because I... I'm useless!"

And then, she collapsed into tears. Gai was, at first, taken back. But the reason for her depression and self-consciousness finally sunk in.

For the longest time, he felt that Tenten felt like the third-wheel in the otherwise amazing Team Gai. Lee and Neji excelled at close-combat fighting, while she had to bring up the rear. Gai and Lee continuously stated that she was essential to balance out the team. Even Neji provided a curt assurance when she appeared upset. Despite what she believed to be her shortcomings (she only only average at taijutsu, a sore spot for quite a while), one thing she could be proud of was the fact that she never missed her mark. Never. But during her match, she not only missed once, but three times. Ever her best attack, which took months to create and perfect, was defeated with the mere twitch of a fan.

It was that way with the three of them. Gai held them back a year to hone their skills, and he bragged about his students' progress. He was absolutely certain they would pass their first try with flying colours. He had made that clear to anyone who questioned their abilities. But the world of hope and perfection they created suddenly collapsed. There was no warning, no signs, nothing. They were on the top of the world, and then they weren't.

Something in the deepest recesses of Gai's heart ate away at his dreams for the future. He convinced himself it was his fault, that he had taken three incredibly capable ninja and watched them tear themselves apart. And it killed him inside.

He placed a hand on Tenten's head. Her hair, usually in its trademark buns, now flopped past her shoulders in a tide of confused waves. He smiled softly and made a ruffling motion. It was what he did to Lee and, on rare occasions, Neji. But it was a small action that made all the difference. Tenten looked up at her sensei and, for once, truly felt like part of the team.

"The lotus of the leaf village blooms twice."

It was all he had to say to dispel tears and draw a small, unsure smile to her face.

She mumbled a quiet thanks, bowed, and left for the training grounds.

Gai contemplated returning to Lee's room. But he could only stare at the ruin of dreams for so long, until something in him cracked. He managed to drag his feet past the hospital doors. The abrupt change from musky death to fresh air was little comfort.

He thought walking would dispel his fears. But with time and silence, they swelled. Confronting Tenten was hard enough. How could he possibly even look at Lee, the failure who placed all his hopes and dreams on his sensei's words? "Hard work can beat natural talent any day." Gai couldn't help but feel it was all a joke. Lee's future was over. He'd never beat Neji, never prove that his dream could be achieved. All the hard work he poured into his training was for absolutely _nothing_.

And it didn't only destroy Lee. It essentially destroyed Neji, too. If Lee had only won, maybe Neji could have finally accepted the fact that maybe, just maybe, there's no such thing as fate. He would discard his cold way of seeing the world and realize that people can change. But Lee's failure only confirmed Neji's belief. Natural talent triumphs over hard work, the main branch will always control the side branches. And it made his hatred grow.

But there was a small voice. It sounded cruel at first, and Gai berated himself for allowing himself to listen to it for even one second.

But it seemed to speak the unavoidable truth.

There was no way Team Gai could have survived in their own little world. They may have been the best of their year, but there was always someone better. Always a higher mountain to climb after the first.

The first part of the Chuunin Exams completely destroyed Team Gai.

But maybe, just maybe... That was what they needed to grow again.


End file.
